Archive for October, 2007
Commerce degree is nothing?
Without accountant,
the best scientific reseach papers,
the greatest construction blueprints,
are just some best-selling fiction novels.
Politicians: History will remember us.
Actuarist: I know the future.
Doctor: I save thousands of lives with a surgery knife.
Economist:
I save millions of jobs with a pen,
and make sure someone is producing that surgery knife.
Lawyer :
By carefully establishing a beyond reasonable doubt,
I can send you into jail for a lifetime.
I can make you disappear.
Financier:
One reckless error of mine
is all it takes to send your lifetime-hard-earned business empire into bankruptcy.
It is too kind to let you disappear,
I’ll make you insolvent.
Priest :
I speak the language of god,
making naive people find the purpose of their lives.
I save your life.
Marketer :
Branding is the universal religion,
causing rational people to lose their mind.
I don’t save life,
but I give you the will to live.
And I guarantee
when you see the price tags
you will say: “Oh, my God!”
Commerce degree is nothing?
Think again.
What I have learnt about relationship in Year 1 Commerce
Transition to Commerce (Teaching & Learning Unit)
Academic referencing is like being in a relationship.
You rarely get merit for doing it right,
but you definitely get penalized for doing it wrong.
Accounting Report and Analysis (306-107)
Having said that your promise is a liability to you, but an asset to me.
However, we don’t depreciate liability; but for asset, we do.
Accounting Transaction and Analysis (306-108)
It is good to have partnership.
It is good to have an equal share of happiness and sorrow,
but please don’t acquire me and form a big family.
Journal entries for consolidating accounts are troublesome, repetitive, and boring.
Introductory Microeconomics (316-102)
Betrayal doesn’t mean you and him are bad “complementary goods”.
It simply means he found a good “substitute”.
Introductory Macroeconomics (316-101)
Relationship is like a currency appreaciation,
you and me benefit individually,
and we suffer as a whole.
Quantitative Methods 1 (316-130)
A line of best fit doesn’t mean you and me are perfect.
It simply means we are equally imperfect on each side.
Business Process Analysis (306-106)
If she says “Yes, I love you.”
That means you have qualified in her “Credit Checking”
If she forces you to say ”Yes, I do.”
That means you are undergoing a relationship ”Pre Billing”.
Finance 1 (333-101)
Relationship is like a mortgage.
You get something in the beginning
and you pay for it in installment for the rest of your life.
In addition,
this “house” might run away.
Running away
will cause you a stronger degree of pain,
namely “unfavourable outcome”.
Not running away
will give you a strong degree of pleasure,
namely, “favourable outcome”.
Therefore,
to hedge this uncertainty of pleasure or pain,
people decide to bear with a certain degree of pain constantly
by getting into a Forward Rate Agreement (FRA)
namely, marriage.
Managing People and Organisation (325-101)
Sorry, this is a bullshit subject that I have learnt nothing.
